Single Mom Out Loud

The joys (and desperation) of raising a boy without a man

21 Things I would Like My Son To Know

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Dear son:

  1. Not everyone is going to like you. Not even family. It’s okay. The ones that matter, love you more than everything in this world.
  2. Not everyone is going to invite you. That’s okay too.
  3. Be kind to animals. Even if you don’t like them.
  4. If you constantly have to tiptoe around them, they’re not your people.
  5. If you choose someone, make sure they choose you back.
  6. Money means nothing if you don’t have people who love you to share it with.
  7. Tip. Anyone who is serving you. No exceptions.
  8. Listen. That’s different than hearing just to reply, or worse, to win the argument.
  9. If you want people to be there for you for the big stuff, you’re gonna have to be there for them in the small stuff too.
  10. Social media is garbage. I will keep you away from it for as long as I can.
  11. Learn about politics and science. Educate yourself on the world. Knowledge is power. And it’s the fuel that keeps the mind alive.
  12. Learn to drive a stick. They are fun and more reliable.
  13. Guns are for cowards.
  14. Learn to throw a punch. You might need to defend yourself one day. Or others who can’t defend themselves.
  15. Your worth will never come from others. What others think of you is none of your business.
  16. Give more than you take, always. Your effort, your time, your love.
  17. Don’t ever let the world dictate the things you like, the clothing you wear, the hairstyle you rock. I think you have this lesson covered.
  18. Apologize. You can’t always be right. And even when you are, you might need to apologize anyway. For the benefit of the things and the people you love.
  19. Admit your privileges. Understand that there are a lot of oppressed and impoverished people around you. Be grateful you are not one of them.
  20. Travel. Go as far as you can and as often as you can. It’s the only way to find out where you truly belong.
  21. And lastly: ALWAYS be respectful to women. No matter the circumstances, no matter the anger. The way you will treat women throughout your life will be the most accurate measure of who you are as a man. And of who I was as a mother.

Love, your mom


Author: Brisa Pinho

Brazilian. Piscean. Project manager. Raising a boy in a man's world... without a man.

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