Single Mom Out Loud

The joys (and desperation) of raising a boy without a man


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Waiting Line

You are a wild horse running alone

and he tries to tame you

compares you to an impossible highway

to a burning house

says your smoke is suffocating him

He mistreats you, pushes you away 

There is something about him that 

simply can’t treat you the way you 

Treat him 

And you tried to understand 

But at what point will you choose 

yourself over understanding him? 

You are always too intense

frightening in the way you want him

unashamed and sacrificial

he tells you that no man can live up to the one who

lives in your head

and you tried to change didn’t you?

closed your mouth more

tried to be softer

prettier

less volatile, less loud 

but even when sleeping you could feel

him travelling away from you in his dreams

The truth is darling, he doesn’t think you are good enough

There is nothing you can do to make him see your value 

To him even the cheapest is better 

so what did you want to do love? 

split his head open?
You can’t make homes out of human beings

someone should have already told you that

Some men are just not into good loyal women

So if he wants to leave

then let him leave

Don’t let him come back 

Eventually every ending  becomes final and every unreciprocated love dies

You are a rare diamond

A jackpot waiting to be cashed in

You are smart but intimidating 

something not everyone knows how to love.